Celebrating perfection through the eyes of a child

Yesterday my middle son, aged 9, became quite concerned that his younger sister's feet were now the same size, if not slightly bigger than his. “Mum, will she be taller than me?” he asked with a frown.

"Why, does that bother you?" I asked.

"Well even the younger girls at school are bigger than me and call me Squirt", he replied.

I thought for a moment before responding, knowing that I could likely condition a thought in his mind with the potential to last a lifetime. Knowing him to be quite a deep thinker, I knew he would understand what came next: 

"Darling, you know that we are all different. Every single person on this planet. Not one is exactly the same as the other. Even twins who look the same, are still their own person with their own unique talents, abilities, likes and dislikes."

"Think about this. The never-ending, infinite intelligence that made the earth, the stars, the planets and all the people on this earth also made you. And this intelligence chose to make you unique. The only one. There will never be another You".

Silence. Always a good sign that he’s listening and thinking…

"It decided the height you should be, the size you should be, the shape you should be and gave you all the talents and abilities you have. So, by wishing you were taller, do you think this super-clever intelligence got the height-bit wrong?"

"Probably not."

"Do you ever wish you were someone else?"

"No, I like being me."

"Great, then do you also agree that you never need to waste any more time or energy wishing you were anything or anyone other than who you are, as the Clever Intelligence knew precisely what it was doing?"

Small nod.

"You have been created in the perfection that is you and that is what you are meant to be. There are no mistakes in this Universe. You have been made the perfect size and shape for the unique person who is You. Do you see? Can you be happy with that?"

Long pause. "I guess so… and I quite like the idea being a special one-off design". 

"Absolutely."

This simple moment between us made me ponder the wider issue of the resiliency of mind of our young people, in the face of comparison and self-judgement they make almost every waking moment of their lives, in every social situation in which they find themselves.

Teaching resiliency of mind at any age is a powerful tool, but the younger children can be taught to develop this crucial skill, the better.

So often our children, the adults they become and the many adults that surround and influence them, see only their faults, the bits they don’t like and wish they could change - size, shape, looks, hair... the list is endless. 

Think for a moment, of the child that is still within us all, that learned to see him or herself critically all those years ago - imagine them as a child of your own, would you not tell that younger You, that you too were created perfectly, to be unique, to be the only one, to be irreplaceable?

True resiliency of mind starts with resiliency in childhood. Never miss an opportunity to remind the children in your life how unique they truly are.

Then remember, it is never too late to talk to that younger You that is still there, still inside you, and remind yourself that you too were created by the infinite intelligence that created the stars, the planets, the galaxies and the Universe.

Stop for a moment today and see yourself as perfection, with faults and blemishes, with habits and shortcomings that are perfect in themselves, as an essential part of the essential You. Your experience, the one you are living right now, with its mundane everyday aspects and moments of life-affirming excitement, is a journey that no-one else will ever undertake. Wherever you are on that journey, take time today to reflect on or even celebrate the perfection of who you are and where you are.

Remember, every day, to tell that one-of-a-kind child within you and any others that are part of your life, that you are all perfect, in every way, that you are not now nor were you ever meant to be, like anyone else.

You are a stunning masterpiece of infinite creativity. Be kind to yourself and celebrate your uniqueness.

The Universe is a richer place with you in it, just the way you are and just the way it intended.